Wear the short dress!

I think it's fair to assume that most of us have at least one particular insecurity that we've carried with us over the years -- those little self-doubts that show up from time to time when we're feeling vulnerable. It could be a physical feature, a personality trait or a perceived fault. One of my recurring insecurities is my legs. Over the years, my legs have been my go-to physical insecurity. As an adult, I've often chosen longer dresses over shorter dresses due to this self-doubt. I also love the look of a maxi dress, so some of that choice is just preference, but on a day where I'm feeling self-conscious, I will always choose the long dress over the short dress. With the onset of perimenopause and the subsequent body changes and resulting insecurities, my gravitation toward longer dresses has never been more prevalent.

I recently took my daughter and some of her friends to Richmond to go shopping, so I had some time to shop by myself. In one store, I found the most adorable dress and I tried it on. It was not my typical go-to maxi- or midi- dress, but a pretty short summer dress. It fit me perfectly and I loved the style and print, so I bought the short dress!

The following week, I was meeting with Bella (all names have been changed to protect privacy) and we were talking about body image. We were discussing that there will be times where we are not happy with some part of our appearance. It is not realistic to think that we will be in love with everything about our body everyday. Rather, we need to acknowledge what we are unhappy with, counter it with a positive thought and not allow the negative thought affect the rest of our day. The conversation moved to whether she ever chose what to wear based on how she was feeling about a particular body part. I confessed to her that I also would sometimes not wear a particular article of clothing based on how I was feeling about my body, and while occasionally that is fine, such as not wanting to wear a tight outfit when we are feeling bloated on our period, it should not be a regular occurrence. I told her about my recent purchase and that I was planning on wearing it to an upcoming concert and I went on to challenge her to do the same over the next two weeks.

Fast forward to that weekend, I packed my super cute short dress and drove to Richmond where I was meeting my sister to go to the concert. Not only did I wear my new dress, but I adorned my giant knee brace in preparation for a night full of dancing and we walked from the hotel to the concert venue. I made sure to send Bella a picture of me wearing the "short dress"! The bands playing were local bands that were popular during my high school and college days, so the venue was packed with fellow GenX'rs and we were all there living our best lives! As the opening act was getting started, I noticed one woman wearing a "Mama Bear" shirt absolutely jamming to the music, while another man was donning an "Everything Hurts" t-shirt while laughing with a friend. The juxtaposition of these middle adult life messages with the pure joy and unabashed fun we were all experiencing was a glorious sight. It was such a reminder that we only get one life and we all deserve to enjoy as many moments as we can. Our children need to see us making choices to love ourselves and love our lives. As the concert went on and the main act, the one I was really excited about, took the stage, my sister and I made our way to the front of the crowd and danced and sang along like we were back in high school seeing them in the dance club where we would go to see them play. And it was the BEST night!! So, next time you think you're too old to dance in the front at the concert or don't have the "right" body to wear something -- Remember that you owe it to yourself to wear the short dress.